JUSTICE MITCHELL

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The Rain In Spain Falls Mainly In Florida

Florida is known for a great many things, the beaches, world-class theme parks, and its weather…Its ever changing, godforsaken weather. What you may not know about Florida is not only are we a wonderful melting pot of cultures and influences, we have some of the worlds most insane weather patterns. What does this mean? LET THE NEWS WEATHER CHANNELS NAMING BATTLE BEGIN!

We have the most intense Doppler, high-definition, interactive, extended forecasted, radar centric, three dimensional, storm tracking, lighting counting, hurricane prognosticating, red-alert creating, surf-level testing, web cammin’, heat indexing, pollen counting, dew point measuring, humidity sucking, current conditions including space aged technology in the world, ported directly into your soon to be demolished by a tornado “modular home”.

So we’re off to the race for your attention with:

  • Doppler 9000
  • Intellicast
  • Accuweather
  • “Weather On The One’s”
  • Digital Doppler X3
  • The Weather Authority
  • The Weather Center
  • Just Weather
  • Weather For You

And those are just the Central Florida naming cesspool! That being said, I think we as creative’s owe the people of this great nation some names with a bit more ass to it. Ergo, I humbly submit the following naming options:

  • The Weather Doopler – “Weather should be a mystery”
  • MANGLASAURICAL 12,000 Laysar!
  • Stormical Weather Wizards
  • RAINDAR v3.0
  • Stormbattical Conquistadar
  • Troppler Defensive Grid System (TDGS)
  • Skynet – Weather Terminator
  • Gridmaishion Weather Matrix

Thoughts?