JUSTICE MITCHELL

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Top 10 Things Zombies Don't Get About Social Media

  1. Worth 1000You need to engage in online conversation, not just simple type "EAT YOU" – it gets old.
  2. Professional zombies might have Facebook, Twitter, Flickr, Linkedin and a blog; this mean little if you can't get into your office due to a crude assembly of poorly nailed boards.
  3. When invited to a Tweetup, Flash Mob or associated 'social' event dress appropriately. Loss of limbs and the smell of rotting flesh are hard to get past your twitter handle.
  4. Just because there are thousands (nay millions) of you in waiting, doesn't mean you have anything of substance to say.
  5. During speaking engagements be sure that your messaging goals surpass one power-point slide of a clip art brain, and you simply trying to cast yourself into the audience.
  6. We're tired of 'tweet pics' from farms, vacant towns, empty gas stations and a bunch of your buddies playing "I can't lift my arms."
  7. Site your social links in your email signature; and enough with the punny' names like 789&UNext@gmail.com is just not cutting it.
  8. Stop filling up my facebook with invitations to Zombie, Vampire and whatever other War you think you're currently "fighting." Funny, considering I can take you out with a shovel.
  9. Replicated tired campaigns like "WE'RE COMING!" and "BRAAAAINS!" with poorly designed print pushing equally redundant tweets on your twitter account says little of your mission.
  10. When starting a blog campaign research new alternate platforms like Tumblr, Posterous and others as they might be better for your target demographic and marketing directives. Make sure that you take them time to equally support your attention to all your social extensions or you'll just come across as some undead yahoo.