Here's a few things that I learned from my recent trip to Vegas.

  • Holy crap has everything gone downhill!
  • The 'City Center' (and their casinos) are now the prime Jewel of the strip just edging out the Wynn & The Encore
  • The casinos plan heavily for Chinese new year
  • There are so many Cirque du Soleil shows they're no longer special
  • There are two kinds of drinkers, those who cannot find a scantly clad waitress to serve them something for free and those with a plastic "yard" in the shape of a titty sucking down grain alcohol
  • The closer you walk to Las Vegas BLVD. the closer you come to depravity and emotional doom
  • Finest line from a pan-handler selling bottled water "the water is free ladies, it's just a one dollar handling fee"
  • A new coat of paint does not equal a renovation
  • All cab drivers should be put on suicide watch
  • People don't know how to have fun anymore
  • "Porn Slappers" (these are the people that slap escort service flyers at you on the strip as you walk by) do not clean up bygone marketing materials
  • Smokers you are a dying breed even in Vegas
  • You can get away with shooting cell phone pictures in the casino, but the same cannot be said for USING a cell phone while playing in a casino
  • Less social media advocacy than I would have imagined from casinos
  • Although more location-based services (LBS) offers than I would have thought
  • There still are black-tie events that are not weddings
  • There's nothing funnier than drunk women fighting their CFMP's trying to fall into an elevator
  • Asian card dealers will take all your money
  • Betting 'with the craps table' is still the best way to enjoy the game
  • Penny slots are treated like the plague; while $1 slots are now treated as the default rate
  • Vegas is still not family friendly
  • There are far more coffee shops in casinos now
  • People really do get up at 7AM to workout in the fitness center
  • Don't even look at the mini-bar unless your Indiana Jones and you have a bag of sand
  • The Excalibur, New York New York, The Flamingo, Circus Circus (anything Bally's) and the Stratosphere all need summoned back to Satan
  • All the servers hate you
  • Tip the cleaning staff and you'll win more mini shampoos than a slot machine on a progressive payout
  • Don't quote "The Hangover" if you don't want pee in your drink
  • Aria Hotel & Casino and Wynn's "Encore" are top-notch
  • No, you'll never be able to afford that necklace
  • Two words: "hand sanitizer"
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